The Time I Gave My Doctor a "Stool Sample"

The Time I Gave My Doctor a "Stool Sample"

Once upon a time, I lay in bed with a mischievous smile on my face. I was devising a prank to play on my doctor. Yes, I'm gutsy. LOL. 

A few days later I was at LabCorp. "May I please have a biohazardous waste bag?" I asked my phlebotomist. We'd become friends, and she was all too happy to help, especially when she learned that it was for a prank.

As soon as I had possession of that precious bag, I placed a stool sample in a clear container into the bag. But I was playing a joke. You see, the stool sample I placed in the bag was a replica of the kind that you sit on.

To make things look even more official, I stuck a requisition for a stool test into the bag.

A few weeks later I shook hands with my doctor, when he entered the room. "The lab wouldn't accept my stool sample," I explained. "I thought maybe you could help me with it."

With his face red with annoyance, my doctor took the bag from me. I could only imagine what he was thinking. Why was I wasting his time with this? He'd told me before that lab issues were to be handled not by him but by his phlebotomist. Finally, my dad interrupted the awkwardness, "Look inside the bag."

"It's a bench?" he asked, confused. 

"It's a stool sample," I replied.

Laughter erupted in the room.

For years, my doctor kept that stool sample on his desk and used it as an icebreaker with his patients. After all, "A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones." (Proverbs 17:22)

What is a favorite prank you've played? Share in the comments below.

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