The Story Behind the Christmas Letter

The Story Behind the Christmas Letter

Well, I guess I let the cat out of the bag last week that I have a sense of humor. I wrote the most bizarre Christmas letter ever, and I thought I ought to explain myself.

When stressed, I usually either cry or become giddy. And I was only slightly stressed while writing the Christmas letter because while eating dinner last Saturday Dad said he wanted the letter to take to church the next morning. Yes, I had less than a 24 hour notice! In his defense, we'd already casually talked about writing a letter, and since I had not yet written one, he offered to do it. 

However, I was determined to write the chronicle myself, so as soon as I finished eating, I sat down at my computer.

But what to write? I told my parents that I feel like many Christmas letters give a false impression of people's lives. "Why even write one?" I wondered. I looked at Strange Planet Comics as I procrastinated some more.

But then the words started to flow as I weaved the first sentences together in Strange Planet style. 

"We have observed the bright star’s position and counted the planet’s rotations. We have concluded that another revolution around the star is almost complete and a new one is about to begin," I wrote.

"Okay," I thought, "good start, but what will people think of my style?" So I then typed, "If the style of this letter seems unusual, consider that normal is merely a setting on the dryer and allow this twenty year old earthing to write as she pleases." "People ought to resonate with that statement," I reasoned. "After all, the below image received 18 reactions when I posted it Facebook in October."

Normally, I don't let anyone read my writing until I'm confident they'll approve. But this letter was turning out so unusual that I asked Mom to let me know what she thought of the first paragraph before I continued. She liked it and laughed. Sigh of relief. I wrote on.

My family loves the movie Princess Bride. I'm a bit embarrassed to admit that I haven't watched it yet, but I have seen clips. So I wrote in Princess Bride pronunciation about Alex and Kathryn becoming "mawarried."

And since they dwell in Squirrel Hill, I wrote that they live on a hill with squirrels. 

"What can I write about my parents?" I wondered. I decided to give a plug for my psychiatric help business, which I established in 2019, and how my parents are regular clients. 

I have some other signs hanging on my wall regarding my business, by the way.

No, I'm not a pastor, but sometimes this is how I feel about my visitors. 

Sometimes we all just need to bang our head, right? I'm accepting new patients and offer telehealth for my psychiatric services, so comment for more information!
I decided to write about our Thanksgiving in the letter next. I said that Ben traveled from the land flowing with milk and chocolate because it's true--he lives in Hershey, PA. But it's also a play on words inspired by the Biblical promised land "flowing with milk and honey."


So, my fellow earthlings, there's a peak into how my mind works! And only my mind--due to the haste, my siblings didn't even know I wrote the letter or that I singed their names to it until after it was printed. Thankfully, they were okay with that. 

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